I'm from the government, I'm here to help.
By the way, the following statements are often attributed to Roman politician and orator Marcus Tullius Cicero (106 BC-43 BC), who once served as Consul of the Roman Republic:
1. The poor, work & work.
2. The rich, exploit the poor.
3. The soldier, protects both.
4. The taxpayer, pays for all the three.
5. The wanderer, rests for all the four.
6. The drunk, drinks for all the five.
7. The banker, robs all the six.
8. The lawyer, misleads all the seven.
9. The doctor, kills all the eight.
10. The undertaker, buries all the nine.
11. The politician lives happily on account of all the ten.
However there is no known source for these apocryphal sayings (or anything remotely resembling it) in Cicero's recorded letters, speeches, and works. Moreover, there is no record of them having been attributed to him (or anyone else) prior to 2012, when they were posted to an Occupy Wall Street-related forum. In other words, it is simply people attempting to demonstrate the aptness of a particular social or political viewpoint by putting these words into the mouth of a revered historical figure.
Previous funnies posted here have been migrated to http://onemanadreaming.blogspot.com/